To See and Be Seen

Recently I was talking to a friend about the impact of a good mother — how a good mother affirms a child with loving insights into the child’s preciousness, innate beauty, and unique giftedness. This is something I miss from my own mom, who blessed me often with reminders of being cherished. Not having her on the earth over a dozen years has left quite a void in that department for me. 

Yet as my friend and I continued to discuss how powerful sincere words of kindness are, we agreed that what I’m referring to isn’t just about compliments or positive feedback. It’s about being seen, fully… and loved, deeply. It’s about someone witnessing your life, who you genuinely are, and caring about what happens in your world. It’s about someone loving you enough to reflect back to you that the movements of your life matter. How meaningful such affection is! 

Really seeing someone requires an ability to look beneath the surface, past the ego and conditioning that can so easily blur our vision, to focus in on another’s true self. And with that clear view of one’s heart and soul, the seer can draw forth gifts, gently uncover invitations to grow, and call the other to more fully experience their authentic goodness. This isn’t about age or knowledge, for even an infant can make this offering. It’s ultimately about presence. 

To be seen only requires a sanctuary in which one can be vulnerable. That is why it comes so naturally between a healthy mother-child bond, where that trust is established from the start. That is also why it’s so painful when such safe keeping is absent or violated. I continually learn not to underestimate the damage that can be done in the inner chambers of another’s being. When we disregard that sacred territory in another we essentially stomp on their worthiness — a sure way to destroy a relationship or much worse. 

Instead, we can choose to honor and protect what matters most in another. We can discover and build relationships that hold holiness in this way. In my life, these people are called my chosen family. They understand that some of the most purposeful time spent in life is to see and be seen… for it encourages the soul to show up and make its lovely contribution to the world. 

Who do you see? Who sees you? Make that valuable connection today. 

May you be inspired!

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