A boundary is something that marks limits and protects. Sometimes it’s a fence around one’s property. Sometimes it’s expressing a firm “no.” Sometimes it’s clarity about trust, or how one expects to be treated.
I have been reading about boundaries lately, from a few sources. I am reminded of how valuable they can be when used wisely. The key, however, is to realize that the duty of upholding a boundary lies squarely on the shoulders of the one who established it.
No one can make another respect his/her boundaries. Boundaries are not demands or a means to control someone else. Instead, they communicate what one will — or will not — do. And they only work when carried out.
If someone barges through a boundary you have set, you then have some new choices to consider. You can acquiesce, you can adjust your boundary if determined worthwhile, or you can allow the consequence of the boundary infringement to take its course — which may mean you walk away from the situation at hand or the person involved. You get to decide.
The beauty of boundaries is that they offer us freedom to take personal responsibility for our own lives. They provide a way of loving ourselves enough to make choices that promote our health and balance. And boundaries give us space to hold our energy for what really matters, that which is ours to do.
May you be inspired!